How To Handle Rejection
When Talking To Girls, Wear Bomb Defusing Gear
Balancing Act
One Single Stigma
Women = A Bad Investment
Chicks and Scifi Don’t Mix
One For The Ladies
A Good Girl In Wolves Clothing
Yes, it is true, my friends, I once was a hopeless romantic. I was the fucking loser who was more interested in opening a chick’s door than opening her legs. I wanted to be in a long term relationship with a girl I could fall hopelessly in love with. I believed in the fantasy of flowers, insightful discussions at coffee shops, and lasting sexual attraction. I bought the entire Hallmark catalog of relationship expectations and all it got me was a world of blue balls.
Just so you know how pathetic I was, I’ll tell you a little secret, one of the more embarrassing philosophies I had at the time. I wouldn’t even masturbate to the mental image of the chick of my romantic desires (sorry to break the first rule of masturbation — a rule it shares with Fightclub – but I had to break it so you can learn from my experiences). I figured our soon to be love was pure, I convinced myself our relationship was on the verge of love (any day now!) and I didn’t want to sully that pureness with dirty thoughts.
You’d think I’d now look back with shame, but I don’t. I look back and appreciate the wisdom these failures afforded me. I look back and know this mind set landed me a lot of female friends, but no fuck time. So with this wisdom, I was able to change my tactics, my philosophy on love and romance, and HeManimalize from Prince Charming to the guy the chicks really want to bang, the black panther, the hawk, the bad boy from across the tracks.
When Talking To Girls, Wear Bomb Defusing Gear
Balancing Act
One Single Stigma
Women = A Bad Investment
Chicks and Scifi Don’t Mix
One For The Ladies
A Good Girl In Wolves Clothing
Yes, it is true, my friends, I once was a hopeless romantic. I was the fucking loser who was more interested in opening a chick’s door than opening her legs. I wanted to be in a long term relationship with a girl I could fall hopelessly in love with. I believed in the fantasy of flowers, insightful discussions at coffee shops, and lasting sexual attraction. I bought the entire Hallmark catalog of relationship expectations and all it got me was a world of blue balls.
Just so you know how pathetic I was, I’ll tell you a little secret, one of the more embarrassing philosophies I had at the time. I wouldn’t even masturbate to the mental image of the chick of my romantic desires (sorry to break the first rule of masturbation — a rule it shares with Fightclub – but I had to break it so you can learn from my experiences). I figured our soon to be love was pure, I convinced myself our relationship was on the verge of love (any day now!) and I didn’t want to sully that pureness with dirty thoughts.
You’d think I’d now look back with shame, but I don’t. I look back and appreciate the wisdom these failures afforded me. I look back and know this mind set landed me a lot of female friends, but no fuck time. So with this wisdom, I was able to change my tactics, my philosophy on love and romance, and HeManimalize from Prince Charming to the guy the chicks really want to bang, the black panther, the hawk, the bad boy from across the tracks.
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